New Directions.

I didn’t think that I would be starting over again in another country. When I moved to Australia last year in early 2020, I told myself that if I loved Australia then I would find a way to stay there for at least a few years. In the last 5 years I have lived in seven states in the U.S. and two foreign countries. The length of time has varied, but I have never lived in any of those places for over 8 months in a single period of time. Yes; traveling is a luxury. Yes; pursuing your dream is something not many in this world are truly able to do.

People are envious of my lifestyle, but I ask them not to be because as with everything, there are trade offs. One of the trade offs for the transitory lifestyle I am living is the inability to maintain a romantic relationship. While I am not interested in marriage at this time, I have had my heart broken over and over again because of my frequent travels and inability to secure a long-term contract (i.e. at least a year). Long distance relationships are not for everyone, and I am beginning to wonder if it is easier to close myself off to the possibility of love to spare myself of the pain that I believe is inevitable if I continue to move from country to country and state to state. It is not that I need a romantic relationship to bring me joy and fulfillment, but the feeling that this is not a possibility for me has become increasingly draining on me emotionally.

And so, when I moved to Australia, I fell in love with the people and the country. I wanted this place to be my home.

By now, I thought that each country would have a handle on COVID and we would be able to travel freely from one country to another. I thought I would return to Australia after completing my Master of Arts degree and my commitment as a graduate assistant. But I was wrong.

I knew it would be difficult to return to Australia once I left in August of 2020, however; I did not think it would be this difficult. For the last year, it seems as though every other week my friends in Brisbane and Melbourne said that they are on lockdown. As the end July, 2021 approached, I decided that I would no longer wait for the Australian borders to re-open and that I needed to take action to move myself forward. I wouldn’t live my life on pause and wait for things to happen—instead, I would make things happen. Australia is still in my long-term plans, but until I am able to return, I have forged a new path for myself.

Three days ago I moved to Israel. I have signed my first professional soccer contract in the first division. I have waited and worked hard for over 10 years to see this dream become a reality. In the past, I signed a contract to play in Italy for a team in Serie B, but was unable to obtain a visa and after a few months was sent back to the U.S. In Australia, I played for a second division team as well. Unlike in Italy, I could play in games in Australia and get paid to do so. While I was a paid and contracted international player, the league in Australia that I played in was largely amateur and therefore, this is my first real contract for a professional soccer team.

When I first created this blog and my social media accounts, it was with the intention that I would only speak from my coaching experience. When I lived in Australia as a player, and now in Israel, I feel compelled to speak on my experience as a player as well. As an older player with collegiate coaching experience, I believe it has enhanced my understanding of the game. In the literature, there is not much research devoted to the player-coach and so I would like to make a shift to include my experiences as a player, specifically an international player.

I am the oldest player on my team. This is a role that I have become comfortable with and it suits me. Whatever my teammates, coaches, club, and community needs, I will step up and lead. I have always liked being an international player, or the idea of international players, because in my eyes, I thought there was always a very clear reason why they were selected to join a club. For me, I was selected because of my age and the “experience” that I bring to a young team. I was selected for this same reason to play for my team in Australia and to an extent in Italy.

From the moment I arrived in Israel, I have fallen in love with my new soccer club. I thought that I was treated very well in Italy, but Israel has surpassed my expectations. My experiences in Italy, Australia, and Israel have made me feel like I am part of a family which I am grateful for because I know that this is not always the case.

And so, the journey continues in my next country, and hopefully my last country. Stay tuned for more stories on my first meeting with my new coach, owner of the club, and teammates.